Finally!

This (courtesy A2Resource) is the backside of the fuse box in my Jetta. Well okay its a diagram of the backside of the fuse box. You can see it, along with what every wire does here. When I posted questions about my electrical faults everybody kept pushing to this diagram so I finally sat down and really examined it. If you look at the top row on the outsides there are two grey/white spools, that helps you orient yourself when standing on your head under the dash. Not really knowing what I was looking for I went through the list looking for anything that pertained to horn, headlight, daytime running lamp or wipers. That finally took me to H2 and J, you'll find them in red in the upper right. This time, knowing what I was looking for, while probing around under the dash I finally spotted that J was unplugged and falling out of its socket. This shouldn't be able to happen, if you look at the bottom right of the connector there a little tab. Just below it theres a white bar that comes out on the right, thats the locking bar that ensures everything is plugged in and stays plugged in. I think somebody must have removed J at some point and not gotten the bar back in place.
Anyway I got J plugged back in and knew I was on the right track when I reconnected the battery and the hazard flashers came on.

Next: Coolant leak.